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Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Thirty Chic Days ~ Being private at home

I have shared on the blog how much I love to read! This summer I am reading two books. I always read two books at a time. It's a habit I developed while I was in college. This summer I have decided to read Bella Tuscany: The Sweet Life in Italy by Frances Mayes and Thirty Chic Days; Practical Inspiration for a Beautiful Life by Fiona Ferris.

I really dove right into this book! It is an easy read and it is delightful! One section of the book that I found to be quite interesting was the part about "being private at home". Here is what Fiona said, "When you are at home with your beloved and your family, create a little mystery around yourself. Close the door when you brush your teeth, don't blabber on about every little thing you're thinking of and don't ask your husband which shoes or jacket looks better. 

Instead choose for yourself then make an entrance into the room, accepting a compliment with pleasure. It is sometimes easier to learn mystique from someone who doesn't have any. Do you want to be that person that others learn from? It's different with family and close friends, but even then you will want to keep your marriage relationship details private. It is many men's horror that their other half will blab embarrassing details to their friends or family about them.

I know of people who don't tell family members private information because they know they will be unable to keep it to themselves. Remember, it's not only that one person you are sharing with, but it's whoever they might tell also. It is respectful of others to not spill their secrets, insecurities or private happenings. 

A foolproof way of knowing if it's okay to relay information about a person is- would I say this if the person was standing right next to me listening to the conversation as well? Or, would I send this email if the person I'm mentioning was reading it over my shoulder? I love this test because it works every time. 

Isn't this wonderful? Not to say that most of us don't know these "social rules" anyway but it is a reminder to be private. I wrote about "Keeping an Air of Mystery" earlier this year.

Keeping mystery at home is a wonderful thing. I believe that there are certain things that your kids should not see you do. In the evening when I am getting dressed for bed, I shut our bedroom door. I do not want my daughter seeing my naked body! I think that is terrible. I have some friends and family who don't mind but that is their business not mine.

Learning to be an "elegant bearing woman" is very hard these days but we must continue to press forward and learn how to be leaders in this area. I hope you enjoyed this and I hope you will pick up Thirty Chic Days. It is wonderful.....

(photos via Google, text via Fiona Harris)


  1. I agree completely. There are some things that should remain private, in all areas of our life, as a woman. I once read a quote (I can't remember where) but it said 'A woman's best kept secret is her marriage'. I have lived by that, even with family and good friends. It's never failed me.

    Your dresses are so lovely, and that darling tea house. I wish we had one here! I really enjoy your blog and instagram.

    1. Thank you so much Gramspearls for stopping by! I always enjoy our little chats. I agree about the marriage. You can put yourself in so much danger with people.

      Thank you for the compliment about the dresses! I was so excited. I saw them in Savannah and they were full price then. So getting them on sale was a dream! I loved the CakeBake shop! I am going to go again but next time with a friend.

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  3. Thank you so much for the mention, Mrs Shockley! I'm such a fan of Aerin Lauder, she exemplifies quiet and understated elegance to me. I love the quote in the comment above too, and your blog is so beautiful.

    1. Thank you Fiona for stopping by! It was a joy to hear from you today. Your book has been inspirational and I have enjoyed it so much! I absolutely adore Aerin Lauder also. Did you see her home tour? I have the video on my blog. You must watch it. Just do a search for Aerin Lauder on my blog and you will find it. Enjoy!

    2. I just watched it, what a delight! I will be viewing it again I'm sure. Thank you, Mrs Shockley :)